 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
“I’m
not afraid of the night. I’m not even afraid when the bullets start.
I take my brother and we lay down in the bathtub until the shooting stops.”
- Quote from
a seventh grade Missouri girl in her essay entitled “The Night.” |
This highlights a significant urban issue, but there are other issues that negatively impact all students. Some of them include drug abuse, teen pregnancy, single-family homes, alcohol abuse, and many more. They are prevalent in rural, suburban or urban areas and impact all social-economic levels. How can we help our children navigate through these negative influences? How do we give them a “roadmap” for success?
In an ideal world, students would go to school in a safe neighborhood where the school is filled with affirming, positive people and where the parents and other caregivers are fully involved in their child’s education. Unfortunately, many of our children do not live in the ideal world. They live in the real world where, in far too many cases, they do not get enough constructive, loving, encouraging adult interaction.
 |
In many cases these negative influences
translate into low attendance, reduced class participation, mediocre test
results, increased discipline issues, and poor personal decision-making.
Teachers spend valuable class time trying to “pull” lower
performing students through their class. As parents, caregivers, and educators
we cannot solve many of these negative influences, but we can give our
children a way to effectively deal with them. As responsible adults our
legacy for our children consists of three things - character education,
goal setting, and educational ownership. These programs cannot solve the
difficult home and society issues children face but they can help students
make sense of a difficult situation and give them a roadmap to a better
life. They can help students develop an “I’ll Make It Happen”
attitude. |
Our children live in a rapid paced, MTV world where they are bombarded with the media messages of success is defined as “bigger, better, faster,” and “you can have it now – and not have to work hard to get it.” All too often the messages they see are that you can lose weight with a pill, flatten your stomach muscles in only ten minutes a day, get a really cool car for $259/month, or learn how to play soccer from a 45 minute video. Many of our children are growing up in the world of instant gratification, and shortly they will be entering the world of hard knocks.
It is essential that students learn that success takes time, planning and a strong desire. Success takes action. Success takes commitment. Success is setting and achieving goals. Success is helping others. With effective goal setting, character education, and educational ownership programs students learn they have a direct responsibility for their education. They learn to minimize excuses and how to take action in their lives.
Parents, teachers and other caregivers want young people to grow up to be healthy, productive, caring adults with a good self - image and a positive outlook toward their future. Young people want the same thing but often do not know how to get it. It is our responsibility to help them “learn the ropes.” When students take educational ownership they take personal responsibility to do something meaningful and positive to change their lives. With ownership comes dignity and self-respect. With educational ownership students realize there may be challenges in their path but they will not allow them to become insurmountable roadblocks to their future.
In order for students to take more educational ownership they need three things. First, they need a sense of purpose – to know that what they are doing is important and worthwhile. Second, they need a sense of belonging. They will develop a sense of belong when they have affirming, constructive adult role models, positive peer influences, and when they are engaged in school activities. Third, to take ownership of their education they need a sense of direction. Students will develop a sense of direction when they learn how to break up large seemingly impossible tasks into smaller, manageable parts and then take action on meeting these new challenges. With educational ownership students will embrace your efforts to help them succeed.
Why is goal setting so important? By learning about goal setting, how to overcome challenges, the importance of being positive, and how to measure their progress, students learn how to take education ownership. If we teach students how to set and achieve goals and how to apply those principles in the classroom, they will learn that they play a significant role in their education and in their future.
How can goal setting help your class or school? Recently, we had a class of twenty four African-American students start an eight part goal setting program. They entered the class with an attitude of “I’m cool and I don’t want to be here.” After three sessions, all were actively participating in the classroom discussion on goal setting and how to take more positive control of their life. Importantly, they were learning how to use these principles today, in the classroom.
What type of goal setting program can help students take more ownership? Students today do not want a lecture on determination or on the importance of having a positive mental outlook. Students want a discussion-based goal setting program that answers three questions:
They want a program where they can voice their opinions and have them validated. The program should emphasize the importance of helping others and should include parents and other caregivers in a collaborative experience with the teacher.
An effective goal setting program should be organized, give students samples and practice, show them how to stay focused and positive, give them realistic ways to measure their progress toward reaching their goals. The program should identify potential roadblocks to their success and how to overcome them. It should have opened-ended, discussion – stimulating questions, and give students meaningful real world examples they can relate to and talk about in class and in home discussions. An effective goal setting program should teach students how to use these principles right now – in this class.
Character education is a large and important movement in education. Progressive schools are reinforcing family efforts to instill important character development traits. Some examples of these traits include honesty, fairness, caring, respect, responsibility, and self-discipline. Like many programs there are various levels of acceptance and engagement within schools throughout the US.
Interestingly, you can “feel” a school’s level of acceptance. You can go into a school an almost instantly tell whether the school honors the character education concepts and lives by them. There is a positive energy in schools where the teachers, administration, and caring adults live and breathe positive, affirming traits and effectively model these behaviors for their students.
If we want our students to take more educational ownership, then we must show them the way. As parents, teachers and caring adults we should model the character development traits and goal setting principles we want to instill into our children. This means we become solution oriented rather than simply pointing to problems. We take positive action rather than simply making excuses or passing responsibility to others. Students should see adults who are honest, self-disciplined, using the goal setting, principles, communicating positively to each other, and helping others achieve their goals. An effective way to change young people’s habits is to model the behavior you want them to follow. They should be able to see their positive role models setting and achieving goals, helping others, and being a responsible adult who they want to emulate.
Marian Wright Edelman of the Children’s Defense Fund stated “never have we exposed children so early, and relentlessly, to cultural messages glamorizing violence, sex, possessions, alcohol and tobacco with so few mediating influences from responsible adults…. Never have we pushed so many children onto the tumultuous sea of life without life vests…”
As responsible adults our legacy to our children consists of three things - character education, goal setting, and educational ownership. They are also life vests for our children.
John Bishop is the Executive Director of Accent on Success®. Please visit the website for additional information.
